Reaching For Stars

i was watching the third episode

and i was reading the hiding place

and i was messing with my hair,

combing through it with my hands

and just thinking

and the scene came on where catherine announces that lindsey doesn't want a party

even though she has a cake

and nick and griss get her the same chem set

and sara asks when it's okay for her to start getting gifts

because of course

lindsey is in the lab all the time

and she's bffs with everyone

i remember the one episode where cath was real busy

and lindsey had to stay at the lab

and it was much longer whan cath came back

and asked for lindsey

and warrick said that she was playing with greg in the dna lab

and i had seen this 3rd episode before

not knowing how early it was

 

so i was sitting there

reading and thinking of all of this

and i saw the love that the csis have for each other

they're a family

a close knit, loving, protective family

and i was suddenly nostalgic

i wanted that love

i remembered being surrounded by friends and family

at all kinds of different times in my life

and i remember the warmth and love i felt

especially from my friends

and just like that

my csi world was restored

but suddenly

i was seeing it through a window

and not from the inside

 

these episodes were filmed in 2000

when we were in kindergarten

when we were 5

when eric szmanda was 25

when my parents didn't fight

when my family had 4 members

when i didn't know that abuse was abuse

when i had no idea you existed

when i was the smartest kid in the class

when i was special in school because my mom was involved

and my sister had my teacher the year before me

when i was just learning piano and didn't know what music would bring to the table

when i probably didn't know what a saxophone was

when my favorite memory was disney world

when my biggest problem was what to do on a weekend

when i had girl scouts on monday, bible club on wednesday, and kinderjaz and gymnastics on saturday

when i had never taken baton

when our mac was a wondermachine

when i had never heard of csi

when i had never met eave, jtd, or nigel

when i had no clue that music would change my life

when the coolest thing in the world was the pocket on my backpack because it was hidden- it's seam was concealed by feathers

when my profession choice had been clear as crystal- art teacher

when my sister was the meanest person i knew

when i had a babysitter and my mom worked every night, so i saw mom about 4 hours a week

when the elementary school was huge, and i couldn't imagine not going everywhere as a group

when hanging upside down from the crescent steps and doing flips on those two handlebars on the playground was the shiz

when i only wished i could memorize the songs the girls in the back of the bus sand

when those songs were by b*witched, n*sync, the backstreet boys, avril lavigne, and aaron carter

when an insanely high amount of bands had astricks in their names

when... when there was no list here

 

 

 

see love struck Romeo hit the street on a serenade
and he’s laying everybody low with a love song that he made
he finds a streetlight steps out of the shade
says something like "you and me baby how about it?"
Juliet’s gonna say "hey it's Romeo you nearly gimme a heart attack"
he's underneath my window she's singing "hey la my boyfriend's back"
you shouldn't come around here singing up to people like that
well anyway what you gonna do about it?

Juliet, when we made love you used to cry
you said you love me like the stars above you’d love me till you died
Well there's a place for us and you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?

we both came up on different streets they both were streets of shame
both dirty both mean and the dream was just the same
and I dreamed your dream for you and now your dream is real
how can you look at me as if I was just another one of your deals?
Oh no you can fall for chains of silver you can fall for chains of gold
you can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
you promised me everything you know you promised me thick and thin
Now you say "oh Romeo yeah I used to have a scene with him"

Oh Juliet when we made love you used to cry
used to swear like the stars above well you’d love me till the day that we died

Well there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?

I can't do the talk like they talk on TV
and I can't do a love song like the way it's meant to be
I can't do everything but I'd do anything for you
Juliet all I can do is be in love with you
And all I do is miss you and the way we used to be
all I do is keep the beat in this rock n roll company
all I do is kiss you through the bars of a rhyme
Juliet I'd do the stars with you any time

Oh Juliet when we made love you used to cry 
you said you loved me like the stars above well you’d love me till the day that we died
there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?

See a love struck Romeo hit the street on a serenade
laying everybody low with a love song that he made
finds a streetlight steps out of the shade
says something like "you and me baby how about it?
You and me baby, now how about it?
You and me baby, now how about it?"

well Juliet the dice were loaded from the start
and I bet and you exploded through my heart
well there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?
yeah now Juliet the time was wrong
oh I know the time was wrong yeah
the time was wrong
yea and I know the time was wrong yeah

 

 

-Romeo and Juliet

Edwin McCain